Couples Therapy: Where Do We Start?

Marriage counseling. The very words can make you cringe. Only couples who are one step away from giving up will try treatment, right? The stigma surrounding couple therapy can make it feel like a last resort, but the truth is that Almost 50% Of couples go for couple counseling at some point. Couples who go for treatment see a About 75% success rate On dealing with their problems and strengthening their marriage. So how do you know if counseling is right for you? And if so, how do you persuade your spouse to give it a try, not to mention finding the right counselor for your relationship?

A couple holding hands in couple therapy.  |  Dating divas
A couple holding hands during couple therapy

Couples go to counseling for countless parties, including:

  • Addictions
  • grief
  • Disagreements over money
  • Different parenting styles
  • sex
  • health problems
  • Frequent conflict

Even the most smooth sailing marriages encountered bumps in the road. While we all go through things sometimes, It’s okay if we need a little extra help to make our marriage even stronger. Choosing to go to couple therapy does not mean that something is inherently wrong, it just means that you care enough about your relationship to do it right. Therapy can be a wonderful tool that will help protect your marriage in divorce and teach you to go through trials together.

Talk about therapy

There’s a great Jim Giffigan joke about McDonald’s that can easily be linked to the stigma surrounding couple therapy. “No one admits he goes to McDonald’s, but they sell six billion burgers a day. There are only 300 million people in this country … I’m not a calculation teacher, but I think everyone’s lying.” Nearly 50% of couples go for marriage counseling, so why is there still a stigma around it?

A couple smiling in couple counseling  Dating divas
Couples work together through couple counseling

We live in a world of highlight reels. If we judge other people’s relationships based on social media, we feel we are failing. But like anything else, it can help to open up and talk about it. Ask some trusted friends if they have ever considered counseling. Find some people you admire in their relationships and ask them how they made their marriage so strong. With enough digging, you are statistically likely to find many couples in your life who have been (and benefited) from couple therapy.

Not all of us need to start posting all our dirty laundry online. However, being open with those we love and trust can help others know they are not alone. They may even seek advice on their own. A stronger marriage around is a goal worth striving for!

Can couple therapy really help?

So how do you know if you really are need therapy?

Even the best marriages are still a combination of two people who grew up in different homes with different values. Trying to integrate your life seamlessly is not going to be easy. A little resentment can build walls between you that eventually become big problems. If we can all look at counseling as a maintenance of marriage and not something to be used only when we need massive repair, we can avoid the huge and painful problems in the first place.

Couples therapy can help you:

  • Work through experiments
  • Strengthen your relationship
  • Help prepare for a life-changing event
  • Help you communicate with your spouse
  • Show you barriers you may not even know existed
  • Provide tools for work through future experiments, which will inevitably come to all of us
Candy Heart Help Message  Dating divas
Candy Heart Message: Help

Perhaps counseling will still not feel needed. However, if it can help you get through something, is it not worth a try?

“For us, counseling was not a difficult decision. It was not something we shared with many people because of the stigma, but I sincerely believe that every person on this planet can benefit from counseling or care (if he has an open mind!) For us, we kind of knew “There will be a lot we wanted to talk about in the presence of someone who can make sure we talk in a healthy and safe way.” -Half a couple who enjoys counseling.

What if my marriage thrives?

Choosing to go into couple therapy because of a specific issue or problem may seem easy, but what if your marriage is stronger or even better than it ever was? Why fix it if it’s not broken?

There is still a plethora of benefits available even to couples who are happy with their relationships. This is another reason to break the negative stigma surrounding counseling! A huge benefit of counseling for many couples is improved communication. Stronger and clearer communication can strengthen your whole family, improve your self-esteem and increase the overall harmony in your home. For some, the choice to start or continue with couple counseling is less about fixing a problem and more about avoiding future problems.

In the end it can only come down to the question yourself: Are we thriving in our relationship? Are there still areas where we can improve? We do regular maintenance on our cars, or even do our hair or nails on a regular basis, so why not put the same continuous effort into your marriage?

In this vein, once you decide to try counseling, the first thing you may ask yourself is How can I find marriage counseling near me? Do not worry; We cover you!

Finding the right counselor for your relationship

Whether you decide to start therapy on your own or you jump in together, finding the right relationship counselor can be one of the most difficult obstacles in the beginning. But persevere, because once you find the right counselor and form a relationship, the results can be life-changing!

Maybe you or your spouse are already meeting a therapist you know and love. You need to discuss whether you want to see the same therapist as a couple or start over with someone new. It is not uncommon for one spouse to feel uncomfortable if there is already a relationship between one person and the counselor. Ultimately, you should decide together what promotes the two of you to success and go away.

Couples counseling near me

Here are some amazing resources to help you find a therapist in your area:

  • Psychology today There is a search engine to look for therapists in your area. You can see their personal biography and credentials. Then you can make the best decision about who looks like the best match for you and your marriage.
  • Call consulting services in your area and ask the office staff if they have consultants who specialize in certain areas. Many counselors will specialize in divorce, infidelity, trauma, etc. This can be a great way to find someone who is willing to jump right in and help with your specific issue.
  • Similarly, ask for recommendations from friends or family who have been to a relationship counselor. Starting with someone you already trust will help build the bond between you even faster.
  • Online therapists are a newer option. They may work great if you are particularly busy, or in an area where there are not many therapists to choose from. BetterHelp Is the largest online consulting service with lots of options to choose from. get back Specially designed for couple counseling! TalkSpace Is an app for added convenience wherever you are.

Takes the jump

Commitment to going for treatment does not mean that you have made the wrong turn in your relationship, it just means that you want some help to be even happier together. The decision to start couple therapy, break the stigma and find a counselor are not always simple, but the reward is so worth it. Here at The Dating Divas, we are all about strengthening marriage. We will encourage you all the way.

Couple in love watching the sunset  Dating divas
A couple watching the sunset

Do you still have questions? Check out our amazing post full of marriage counseling resources or check out our amazing Reclaim Your Marriage program.


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